Saturday 15 August 2015

Capsule query - Do work clothes 'work' at a wedding?




I went to Sheffield for some friends’ wedding reception last weekend. The whole do was steam punk themed and in my normal life I would have used this as an excuse to go bonkers on a costume, however the challenge didn’t offer me that option – so instead I had to pick something already on the list. I went for my green silk dress and black heels. I thought because I looked wedding appropriate that I’d get away with it, but it turn out what I wear is as much about how I feel in my clothes as how I look in them.


Day 78 -Me & Donna at the wedding



When I began this challenge I thought a lot about how I could make sure I had clothes that looked right for all of the occasions I might have to go to. And I think I’ve done pretty well with 23 items so far to cover looks appropriate for all sorts of occasions. What it turns out I hadn’t thought about was that I buy clothes for the impression I’m trying to make in them, and that wearing the same dress to a wedding as I wear to speak at conferences might cause me some confusion.

I bought the dress I wore to the wedding just over a year ago to wear to speak at a conference, since then I’ve worn it to several more conferences, meetings at government departments and with trustees, events at Westminister, donor meetings and other professional settings. This dress has become my sartorial ‘safe pair of hands’ outfit. I wear it almost exclusively when I am trying to exude trustworthiness, reliability and good sense.  And because I wear it for this sort of thing, it has become a part of my armour – I associate particular behaviours with it and weirdly I find it more natural to live those behaviours when I’m in it. In this dress I stand a little taller, talk a little slower and swear a whole lot less.

Which is perfect for work based occasions. But this weekend I wasn’t at work. I was with my husband and a load of friends I have known since I was a teenager, celebrating a wedding in the back room of our local pub. The behaviours expected of me in this environment are really very different and I was struggling to make the transition.

People kept asking me if I was ok and I kept telling them that weirdly I just didn’t feel able to let go the way I normally would. I felt like I was at a professional event – like I should be diligently networking, and writing notes about connections between people I’d said I would follow up. And that’s not what I should have been doing.

I should have been giggling with my friends about how easy it is to photograph Heathers calves so they look like a bum, throwing shapes on the dance floor and covering myself in red lipstick. You know - this kind of stuff....




Of course – there was a way to get past the whole professional boundaries thing. Not a mature, healthy or advisable way, and a way I regretted on the bumpy train ride home – but none the less. It turns out a short cut to feeling like you are 19 again, is to drink like you are 19 again. A fab night was had by all – though the (predictable) side affect of this was that I woke up the next morning feeling (and looking) 80.

Day 79 - Hangover has aged me by a decade!

So lesson learnt? Even with very few wardrobe choices if you live a life where your professional and personal lives are miles apart, it might be worth identifying which clothes work best for which areas. Personally that dress – it’s just for sensible times for the rest of the year – mainly because I don’t want to find myself channelling ‘naughty Ed’ at a work event.

Can I just take a moment to thank you all both for your donations (not even 3 months into the year and already we’ve raised nearly half the target – THANKYOU), and for reading and sharing the blog. I’m not really sure how it happened but there have been more than 8500 views on this blog so far. Wow! 

Lots of you lovely people have been in touch with me and I’m really loving hearing from you – please keep the comments and emails coming. One thing a number of you have asked is how it’s easiest to follow the blog. Well I’ve just joined Bloglovin’, it’s a fab site that lets you follow all the blogs you like in one place. There is a follow button on my sidebar – if you join you’ll get an alert everytime I post new content – plus it’s a doorway to all sorts of other cool blogs, like this one.
 
So THANKYOU, and since it looks like the rain has stopped just in time for the weekend I really hope you all have lovely sunny Saturdays,

Ed x

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